August 2007

please no please

I have been trying to hold back the seemingly inevitable self-fulfilling prophecy. To levee back the wall of negativity and depression. I have found that the concept of the aforementioned is akin to my cowlick. For 22 years I fought my unruly hairline. Until a wise stylist told me “Stop fighting it and work with [...]

eew eew eew

you want to know what’s grosser than finding a dead possum in your driveway? Driving in to you driveway and spotting a dying possum in your yard. Being the harden woodswoman I am, the first thing I did was grab the mobile phone and call Mister to scream “THERE”S A POSSUM IN THE YARD!” What [...]

Not that I’m counting or anything like that

just when I thought we were past this

I haven’t had any more questions from Fluffy about our incident last week. That was until last night. We were all hanging out on my bed, then Mister went in and took a shower. I told the girls, time for bed, you need to get out of here. Fluffy asks “Why?” I tell her “Because [...]

Two Year-Old For Sale!

A phone-flushing chair-spinning turtle-loving two year-old for sale!! No refunds returns or exchanges. Some terms and conditions may apply See warranty for details. That damn phone better dry out and be in perfect working condition tomorrow morning or I’m giving her to the circus!

a milestone I could have lived without

Oh My God! I prayed I’d never see the day that my child would see me having sex. My stupid husband did not lock the door. Just as he is almost done, the door clicks and we hear feet running through the living room. We think she has just bumped the door. I jump in [...]

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